inferior. on Tuesday, December 22, 2009, 12:54 PM
Less text messages. No more phone calls or taking the initiative to call, unlike before.The sudden reminders of your love for me. No more convincing assurances. No more
taking the initiative to assure me so as to prevent me from thinking negative or
become paranoid/oversensitive, unlike before. More battery going dead as a reason
so as to avoid talking to me. Whining about being tired every night so as to avoid
speaking to me. Less tyme spent together which leads to us drfting apart. Less tyme
seeing or meeting one another ( undertandable i suppose ). No more sweet, true &
sincere words. Which basically means no assurance. The mean & heck care attitude.
The attitude that always make me think i am always to blame. The egoistic & never
want to lose character. The 360 changes. Theres plenty more, but i will stop here.
All these just leads to me thinking you have someone else, do youknow that?
You think i like posting negative stuff about you? NO. I never turn to anyone because
i do not want to make other people lives as contradicting as mine, i would rather go
through it alone. Therefore, i sit & cry alone in my bedroom too. The only word you
keep repeating to me is "Sorry." Do you really ever mean it? If yes, you wouldn't keep
making me cry every single night because of your mean & nasty & unnecessary
behaviour. You make me weak, you make me feel inferior, you make feel small. But,
don't youknow, that i am still stupid enough, to want to love you & stick by you?
You are whom i want, whom i need. No matter how mean you are, i still want to stick
by you. Why!? Because, i love you too much. & you will never understand how much
i am going through & am suffering because of just your attitude. You will never
understand what true love really means, i am done here.
Gotta get ready now, got a doctor appointment at 2:15pm. Till here, ciaozxs ~
